Legal team on standby
Our solicitors, Crapstone Bumwilley Scrotum Scrotum and Haversack, are on standby* to issue a writ if Mr Jeremy Vine persists in introducing his radio program with a phrase very similar to our motto "All the news that's unfit to print" as he did today. [Exhibit A.] We will be listening carefully to ensure that the prefix "un" is not added.
*Either young Mr Scrotum or old Mr Scrotum himself will be handling the case (an indication of the importance we attach to this matter.)
1 comment:
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It will be either young Mr Scrotum or old Mr Scrotum who deals with the matter.
Post by : FM (host81-128-246-113.in-addr.btopenworld.com / )
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I recommend those solicitors. Our youngest was up on criminal damage and shoplifting charges and he was already on a 2 year bender but Mr Crapstone was marvellous. He lied his head off and got him off. He's a better liar than our Edgar, you should have heard him. I almost believed him myself in the end. Well worth the money and he said he'd waive his fees if we introduced 5 asylum seekers to him so he could get the legal aid. Since Johnny is a builder that was no problem and we were actually able to pay for our Christmas by introducing 27 to him, so it was a double whammy because these 27 built our bungalow over on the Hendon Way for us.
Hope this helps.
Post by : Tina Humphreys (webcacheh09b.cache.pol.co.uk / )
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Seconded
I second that. They are excellent lawyers. They have got me off a few times. As Tina (hi Tina!) says, Mr Crapstone is a top liar and the others are no slouches in that department either. Ms Haversack is especially good because she is quite young and looks innocent. Haha. Crikey, I wouldn't trust her to look after my cat. She is a brilliant liar, easily the best woman liar I have met.
Post by : Bob John (webcacheh04a.cache.pol.co.uk / )
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Thirded
I can vouch for that. I was recently presenting the police's case against T... B...., a well-known local bare-faced larcenist. By the time Ms Haversack had finished with me I thought I had done the crime myself. I was convinced of it. I didn't know whether I wanted a sh*t or a shampoo. She is a wonder to behold at work. Barristers generally are wonderful liars but the aforrementioned firm are the creme de la creme when it comes to dishonesty.
Post by : DC Ruston Bucyrus (webcacheh10a.cache.pol.co.uk / )
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